So I am at the library working on my final papers. There is a guy sitting right behind me reading the paper, and about every 30 seconds he goes, "Hmm," or "That's interesting." I thought he was on the phone, but no, he is just reading the paper all by himself. He is not exactly using his inside voice either. Does he want me to turn around and ask him what he is reading because he seems to be enjoying it so much? I want to set that paper on fire.
Low-carb diets, Michael Moore, the Republican National Convention, Kabbalah and all Kabbalah-related products, Hi-def TV, the Bush daughters, wireless hot spots, 'The O.C.', the U.N., recycling, getting Punk'd, Danny Gans, the Latin Grammys, the real Grammys, Jeff that Wiggle who sleeps too darn much! The Yankees payroll, all the red states, all the blue states, every hybrid car, every talk show host, everything on the planet, everything in the solar system, everything everything everything everything everything everything everything that exists -- past, present and future in all discovered and undiscovered dimensions, Hugh Jackman, and all white guys who add ‘izzle’ to anything.
