Some Color. Yaay!

While sitting in my gray rectangular work home yesterday I realized I needed to run out to my truck. While walking through the parking lot I walked by a sheriff’s car in our parking lot, which isn’t that odd because there are always cops at the Crown Burger next to our office for lunch and dinner. The rest of his crew cutted moustched friends were parked in the Crown Burger parking, but it was pretty busy so I guess he decided to come park in our lot. The only thing was he parked in our handicap spot while there were plenty of spaces open right next to said handicap spot. There isn’t much that grinds my gears worse than someone who has too much authority or too much money and believes themselves above the rest of us normies, and doesn’t think the same rules apply to them. I mean nobody is going to give this guy a ticket.

On the way back I walked by the cruiser again and thought that I should leave a note on his car, a ticket if you will. I recruited an accomplice and we wrote out the ticket on a purple post-it that said, “This is your ticket for parking in the handicap spot, douche. Sincerely, Everyone.” We walked out the side door and as we walked by the car I slapped it on his driver side window and then proceeded to go in the front door of the office. As we entered we felt that justice had been served. Neither of us had a view out a window that would enable us to observe the officer as he read his ticket. I kept standing up from my desk to look and see if he was coming, but knew I would probably miss him.

About an hour later someone came into my area and said, “Who has purple?” I looked around my cubicle wall and sure enough there was the sheriff, moustache and all, holding the note I left on his window. I took my post-its and put them under my leg. Of course everyone else was pretty confused and asked him what was going on.

“I want to apologize to whoever called me a douche.”

“Someone left a nasty note on your car?”

“Yeah, they called me a douche.” I was laughing pretty dang hard at this point and IM'ing my accomplice.

“Oh man, no one here would do that.”

I think the cop said the D word like 50 times while he was in the office. It tickled me every time.

Apologize? Yeah right. He was pretty pissed and we all know that cops, along with politicians and referees, don’t apologize to people. Even the people who didn’t know what was going on knew that he wanted to confront the person who bruised his giant cop ego.

He then proceeded to walk around the entire office looking for purple post-its and colored pens (I had written it in red pen). Most everyone has purple post-its because those are the ones the office purchased most recently.

“I didn’t realize it was a handicap spot.” Uh-huh. The big freaking blue square with the handicap symbol inside didn’t tip you off, huh? Neither did the post with the same symbol? Yeah right, but still, if the rest of us wouldn’t have realized it we still would have earned a parking ticket.


I was kind of bummed that the people around me didn’t think it was funny as it was, but after the officer left we claimed the note and gave the whole story of him being parked in the handicap spot while there were several open spots nearby. They didn’t realize he was parked there so then it all made sense to them then. They told us if we ever did something like that again we need to let them in on it so they can enjoy it as well. I actually got yelled at because people were scared when he came up to talk to him, but the overall sentiment in the office concerning what we did was pride. Good times.

We sufficiently got our point across. In hindsight, while trying to stick it to the man, maybe calling him a feminine product wasn’t the greatest of ideas, but I was upset, and I am sure had a disabled person needed the spot they would have called him much worse.