Help Save The Youth Of America From Exploding

At the end of the last post I quoted the song from which the title of my blog came from. I thought after that some might want to know where it is from if you don't already know. It is from the song "Help Save The Youth Of America From Exploding" from Less Than Jake's fourth Album, Hello Rockveiw. Here are the lyrics in case you are interested:

Sit down. Remind me how
this is the same old story of growing up and getting lost.

And just outside I can hear the sound
of the early morning street
becoming way too loud.
The hum of the engines in the cars on the street.
And with this cigarette that I just lit
as I passed the 53rd Street bridge.
Right now the world just seems too big,the world just seems too big.

Sit down. Remind me how
this is the same old story of growing up and getting lost.

And just outside I can see my breath
in between the words
that fog my spinning head.
And I can see the sun coming up,
and its just light enough to see.

And all the late-night calls
with all the lost hopes.
And all the missed connections
and the lost directions.

Sit down. Remind me how
this is the same old story of growing up and getting lost.

Time for another one of those 'What did/does/will it all mean' kind of posts.

I got a lot stuff running through my head. They seem to be all tied together somehow in there, but not really organized, so I am just going to write them down and hopefully you will see how they are all connected.

I am back "home" (in this instance home refers to where I currently reside) after having gone home home for Thanksgiving. I am grateful for Theraflu.

And as it happens everytime I come back to school after being home I get blue (I think it is actually more of a grayish color with black speckles in it). I can think of a few reasons I get this way. One would be I have to go to school tomorrow. Middle finger to that. Moving on.

Sometimes I wonder why I moved down here. Most people leave to go to school to get away from home. I haven't really lived with my parents since I was nineteen, but I was still home; in Salt Lake. People leave home for different reasons: they don't like it there, to get away from their parents, to experience different people. If you live in Utah you might want to go somewhere where they have real beer and more boobie bars, and if you are LDS in Utah you might want to experience the church outside of the state.

All that is good and fine, but none of them apply to me. I have never had a desire to leave home. I love my family and my friends and my ski resorts and my desert and my sand dunes and my canyons and my church and my restaraunts and my area code and my theaters and my streets and my mountains and my valley and my venues and my music stores and my sky and my winter and my fall. I love home. So why did I leave? Granted I didn't go too far away, just over 3 hours south, but when I go back and see my family and my friends and my stuff I sometimes wonder why I left them. And the real disheartening thing is when I come back to Cedar and it feels more like home than Salt Lake does.

In the last week of October we got quite a bit of snow one night. I had no idea it had snowed until I walked out my front door. Those who know me can picture the smile I had on my face when I saw this. I love the snow, and while I knew it would be gone in a couple of days I thought it might mean that winter might come a bit earlier than usual. Ever since that day when I wake up in the morning and I can tell it is over cast outside I crack open my blinds to see if it snowed, and have been disappointed every time when I see the dead stale ground outside.

I was told by many people that we were supposed to get snow over the weekend in SLC. I waited and waited and no snow came. I really was bummed out. I knew this girl named Summer once, and on days where she couldn't see the sun she got depressed. I mean, you really didn't want to be around her on an overcast day. Now I don't get depressed on sunny days, but my mood does improve by 50% on rainy days and a good 80-90% when it is snowing. I think because the world tones down a notch. It shrinks a little. Becomes more manageable.

I haven't been to Brianhead, but I hear good things. I am looking forward to going boarding this season although I will be going alone. That doesn't bother me at all. I have my ski crew back home and if I can't go with them I would rather go alone. I have had quite a few conversations with people here at school where the phrase, "We should go (snowboarding)," has been said. I even met a girl who works at Bruanhead and says she can get me free passes. I will usually say, "Okay. Sounds good," or something but really hope they never call me. Is that healthy? Probably not, but if I am going to buy a pass (I have already decided going with that girl isn't worth it) and drive up the canyon I might as well enjoy myself as much as I can. If I can't ride Gad-2 with my buddies and mess with the out-of-staters than I would rather hit the cherry cherry pow pow alone. It makes sense. Really, it does.

I have had a few potentially good things come into my life this semester. The kind of things where I get the feeling that if I went ahead with them good things would come of it (hence the title "good things"), but this would mean change and progress etc. I sometimes think that there are other powers that be that are pushing me into these things and I resist instinctively, which is of course ridiculous, especially for a person who believes in "other powers that be" and that thinks that "they" wouldn't lead me astray. Yet, I resist and think that somehow I will be fine just the way I am if I can just hold out until the snowfall comes. I will be happier and in less need of any other good things.

"Sit down. Remind me how this is the same old story of growing up and getting lost...right now the world just seems too big."

Old Friend - Rancid

Really any Rancid song would do. Giving me one last chance to dance around my room and play air guitar in front of the mirror.

Operation Ivy was together from 1987-1989 (in the two years they were together they played 185 shows), Tim Armstrong and Matt Freeman later formed Rancid in 1991 with the drummer Brett Reed, picking up where The Clash left off. Lars Fredriksen later joined the band in 93’. Operation Ivy’s story is told in the song Journey to the End of the East Bay on Rancid’s album And Out Come the Wolves.

The Rancid Punx have given us a slew of punk rock over the years, other than their six, soon to be seven, full length releases, they have a number of side projects. Ever since 2000 they have released a full length album each year.

2000 – Rancid (self titled)
2001 – Fredriksen’s project, Lars Fredriksen and the Bastards, releases first album.
2002 – Armstrong's side project The Transplants release first album.
2003 – Rancid’s Indestructible released.
2004 – Lars’ second solo album, The Viking, released.
2005 – The Transplants second album Haunted Cities.
2006 – Tim Armstrong’s solo record. It is being released over the internet a song at a time and can be downloaded for free as a thanks to all the fans and support over the years.
2007 – Rancid is set to release their seventh album.

Tim Armstrong also started a record label, Hellcat Records, in order to help out other bands and help get the music out to the people. A lot of punk bands have made their way to Hellcat, including: Dropkick Murphy’s, U.S. Bombs, Tiger Army, Time Again, The Unseen, and The Clash’s Joe Strummer’s band, Joe Strummer and the Mescaleros.

When a Rancid song is played in between sets at a concert it is one of the only times where everyone is singing out loud together and dancing when there is no one on stage, because we all know the music and are thankful for it because it helps us to get up when we’ve “been knocked out, beat down black and blue,” and odds are they are the reason we are at the show in first place.

For all the unheard - The Bouncing Souls

This would be my way of thanking all the music that has pushed me along for so...long, and apologizing that I couldn’t listen to it all while I laid on my deathbed. I could make a list about my favorite music about music too, but won’t.

This is the last song on the Bouncing Souls album The Gold Record that came out in July:

A guitar collects dust like his heart, soundless and still A girl collapses on her bed writing words never read, troubled youth spills over into troubled life and times We walk alone with our troubled minds A guitar strikes a chord hits the misery so hard so bold, sounding through this world where it is so hard to feel that gold It’s running through us all, a beauty buried deep under a river of grief where the muddy waters flow and the stones don’t roll This is for all the unheard, all the music left behind, all the songs left on the floors of the closets of our minds Where’s the passion gone in our hearts? Lost somewhere in the grind; it’s time to bring it back, its time to unwind, find what we lost, it’s time to bring it back A lost song lingers on, bouncing off stars on and on, a moment gone or is it looking for you to sing its tune

Rad, huh?

Bankrupt on Sellin - Modest Mouse

Out of all the songs on this list this one by far fits the best, and was the easiest for me to choose. The tone that the guitar line creates (same one throughout the song) is pretty thick, and its inertia is strong enough to last you almost an entire day.

Televators - The Mars Volta

At the Drive-in broke up in 2001 due to differences of opinion on what direction to take the band. One side( Cedric Bixlar-Zavala, Omar Rodriguez-Lopez) wanted to take it in a more progressive experimental direction, and the other wanted to focus on the rock aspects of the music and take it in a more traditional rock direction. The band split and both sides went the way they had wanted, forming The Mars Volta and Sparta.

Now, as much as I love At the Drive-in, if the sole reason for them splitting was to form The Mars Volta I say it was worth it. Listening to a Mars Volta album is unlike anything else. You get sucked into the storyline of each album so intensly that when it ends, and the silence begins again (there is no silence on any of the albums) it is a rough jolt back to the real world. But because the instrumental aspect of the music is so incredible the lyrics get overlooked just about everytime in reviews and conversations (I know I always talk about the music), but Bixlar-Zavalas poetry on the records is amazing and matches the intensity of the music perfectly.

Soul Suckers - Amos Lee

I have said it before and I will say it countless times more: Amos Lee is awesome. Nuff Said.

Short on Ideas / One last Cigarette

Less Than Jake is on the list just because they have to be. Very few days have passed since I was thirteen or so and I asked my friend, Clay, who he was listening to and he gave me his headphones so I could have my first listen to what is known as Gainseville Rock, that I haven't listened to Less Than Jake. I went and bought Pez-Core as soon as I could get my parents to take me. This is the last song (kind of a two in one-er) on that album, and is my favorite LTJ song on my favorite LTJ album.

Its 4 a.m. and I just passed
The westside buildings, all the broken glass
As I try to shake the cold away
But anyway
Its late at night and I’m about to crack
And decide to just walk the tracks
That I just walked yesterday

Sad Eyed Lady of the Lowlands - Bob Dylan

A few good reasons for this one. The first being it is long. It is over eleven minutes long, That is enough for like three or four normal songs. This is the kind of song you would think people would pick. It is calm and somber and relaxing. I thought about all of these things while I thought about if I would want this on my deathbed playlist, but my main reason is the harmonica that comes in at the tail end of the tenth minute and finishes out the last minute-forty or so of the song.

It is Dylan after all and the harmonica is all over the place in his music, but to me this solo is different than the others, I think a reason is the length of the song. The first nine and half minutes of the song lead up to this part and the harmonica sort of summarizes everything that has happened up to that point. This brings me back to the language of the music: You have to listen to the entire song to get the harmonica. You could, I suppose, fast forward to 9:43 and just listen to it, but it wouldn't make sense. You wouldn't get much out of it. It would be like opening a book to the last third and reading a couple of pages. You could read the words but they would be out of context.

I am not sure what order I would play these in, but this would be a great song to end with, but I am still not sure what I would do.

Change - Blind Melon

I can safely say that this is the song that really got me into music (as my memory has it). This Blind Melon album was the first I ever bought. By that I mean my parents bought it--warily. I wanted it to listen to No Rain, and did I ever listen to it. I would listen rewind repeat. Eventually there came a time when I decided to see what else was on the tape and soon found Change, the song right before No Rain. That was my first true musical experience, where I found that it is just more than words and sounds.

I was little still, and I am sure I couldn't fully comprehend truly what the song was about, being that I hadn't lived too much of life, at this point just over a decade, and I didn't know what is was like to know that when life is hard you have to change because I really hadn't entered life yet, but I got the feeling of the song crystal clear. There is no language barrier in music. I think I thought that once I got into life this is what it had to be like. Now that I have lived a good portion of my life and have had my own ups and downs, I understand what it is like to be sitting in your own misery and unable to see the sun from your current vantage point. And while standing up and looking way up to the sky will solve your problem, and how it is easier said than done when you are comfortable where you are.

I don't feel the suns comin' out today
its staying in, its gonna find another way.
As I sit here in this misery,
I don't think I'll ever see the sun from here...
When you feel your life ain't worth living
you've got to stand up and take a look around
you then look way up to the sky.
And when your deepest thoughts are broken,
keep on dreaming boy,
cause when you stop dreamin' it's time to die...

When life is hard, you have to change.

Synesthesia - AFI

AFI doesn't really play the type of music I would think I would want to be listening to while dying. It is loud and hard, but I would have to. I would want to listen to Davey Havok's lyrics one last time. Synesthesia is kind of an odd choice itself; it is a b-side from a very good album, but not my favorite album. After thinking about it this just seemed to be the one that fit best.

I noticed a long time ago that my long term life goals seemed to be based around how I would be remembered by people after I died. I don't mean friends or family, but strangers who have seen what I have done. I don't do it on purpose and it hasn't really gotten me anywhere, but I think that way anyway. This song seems to share that same feeling.

Heartbreak incarnate. I'm nothing if not your memories...Someday I will be, I'll be those common words spoken uniquely
Because I may, will forever be, Floating as you feel
Just say, Say you will for me
Invite me to your memories
Just sing, sing again for me
That long forgotten song

Janie Jones - The Clash

The first thing I see just about every morning is my London Calling poster. The one where Paul Simonon is about to smash his malfunctioning bass. According to him that was the only time he smashed a guitar, and he kept all the pieces.

I have to agree with Rob from High Fidelity, Janie Jones is definitely in the top 5 of best track ones, side ones (it also happens to be the first track of The Clash’s first album). I don't know what order I would listen to these but I know I would start with Janie Jones.

Joe Strummer died in 2002. Thanks for the tunes Joe.

Top Ten

I think it must be because I recently read High Fidelity again and that I just wrote a story about death (suicide, really. The guy capped himself in the end, while listening to Knockin on Heaven's Door, but now think that he might have to live), but lately I have been thinking about if I were about to die and I could listen to ten songs before I did, and I would die as soon as the last song was over, what would they be? This list is what I came up with. I was originally just going to list the songs, but that proved impossible for me, so I gave each song a seperate post.

I noticed that this list isn’t necessarily the same as if I were to make a list of my top ten favorite songs. I think such a list would be near impossible for me to come up with, but top ten death or car or night or morning songs, or top ten songs to listen to when you feel blue or happy narrows it down enough to be able to think about it coherently without overloading your head with too many titles and tunes.

Anyway, here you are:

Blogger A.D.D.

A while ago I deleted my blog. Not too sure why. The short version goes something like this: I was working on it, got mad, and then deleted it.

A few days ago someone asked me about the time I had to go help my roommate get his truck unstuck, and I didn't really remember the story very well, but on my blog I had six whole chapters of the experience, and I wanted them back. I am really bad at writing in my journal, and odds are that even if I was good at it I wouldn't write the same kind of things in there, so I decided to start it up again. My sister was somehow able to pull out my posts from my deleted blog and email them to me, so I have put them on this one also. All the posts in the October folder are from the old blog. They are all out of order and missing the comments, but they are here nonetheless.