Tuesday, November 25, 2008

In Case You Were Interested 2

I have had a lot to say lately, I just haven't had the time to say it. Going back and writing all the stuff that I previously had to say is very daunting, so you will just have to settle for new stuff.

I have been hyper-observant all day. That may not be the correct term because it is not like I have been noticing tons of things that I wouldn't notice when I wasn't being hyper-whatever-the correct-term-would-be-if-observant-isn't-the-correct-word; it's more like the things noticed have meaning, or more meaning depending on what they were.

It didn't start when I saw the girl microwaving bacon this morning. It didn't start there, but I think that is what primed me for it. I went into the break room to fill my mug up with hot water and saw one of my co-workers microwaving bacon on what I think was a single layer of paper towel. The grease was exploding and causing an obnoxious ruckus. She opened the microwave and muttered something. This something, I believe, was supposed to communicate to me that she was confused as to why everything was so loud (her thinking I didn't know what she was cooking), but really conveyed to me that she was embarrassed that I had walked in on her boisterous disgusting act and was feigning confusion as an excuse to stop the microwave and wait until I had left to continue permanently ruining the microwave (I had pizza rolls today cooked in that microwave—no bueno). She didn't have a plate; she took the greasy crap to her desk to eat in paper towels (where she found the paper towels I have no idea; they somehow elude me), and I can only imagine what her desk looked like when she picked them up to throw away. You know when Willow hit the troll with the wand and it starts to turn into the two headed dragon? Of course you do, but in case you need to be reminded here it is. Her mass of nuked pig looked kind of like that. I told whomever was online what I had witnessed, and my mind was prepped for noticing other things throughout the day.

Before we move on can we take a look at this clip from Willow? It is so freaking awesome.

How awesome is:
The music, especially during "Can you ride? Let's ride!" part?
The catapult part?
Madmartigan and his troll kick?

I love:
Madmartigan's face when he turns around and sees the dragon for the first time.
How everything the skull faced guy says throughout the entire move is shouted. "Destroy the Beast! Find the Baby!"
When Madmartigan realizes he is standing with the bad guys

Why:
Does the dragon's head explode?
Do trolls sound like steam whistles?
Is there a talking goat? What!? You need to watch Willow! Now! You think I'm joking?!

Great Lines:

"Go in the direction the bird is flying!"
"He's going back to village!"
"Ignore the bird. Follow the river."

Madmartigan: "I love you, Sorsha?" I don't love her. She kicked me in the face.

Favorite line when I was little:

"We stole the baby from you, Daikini, while you were taking a pee-pee!"

Moving on: It started when I realized I didn't have a pen for class. Me. Not having a pen. I have no excuses. I don't know what happened. I am a wonder when it comes to writing instruments. It is not uncommon for me to lose a pen a day for seven days in a row, and have been known to lose upwards of three in an 8 hour period. Where they go and what they have going with the paper towels is a bloody mystery. I usually just buy a couple large packs of Bics and pour them into my backpack. Unfortunately, my backpack, along with my spare pens, had been stolen (part of the old stuff) and so I had no pen stash to fall back on.

I eyed the floor as I walked to class hoping to capitalize on someone's loss. Unfortunately again for me, nobody had lost and I walked into class naked. . .no, the reason I did not have a pen was not because I wasn't wearing pants. I had pants on, I mean I felt naked because I always have a pen in the left pocket of my current waistwear. So, I walked into class feeling as though I was naked still searching the aisles of the stadium seating. I took my usual seat, third row, left aisle, and looked at the floor around me—no pen, but I did find a torn piece of blue paper, a AA battery and a Junior Mint. That is when I started thinking of story ideas about finding things you aren't looking for and thought of a line and went to write it down in my notebook I keep in my left rear pocket and reached for a pen. . .Seriously? Did I just look in my pocket for a pen. Yes, I did. I sat back hoping I would remember the line (which I have forgot) reached in my bag and pulled out Carver and began to read the story "What do you do in San Franciso?" After I read the line "That was Saturday, as I said, the day before Memorial Day," I realized I must pee.

I stood up and left while taking advantage of my trip to the men's room scouring the floor for pens. With the rush of writing ideas, and with the few pages I read of Carver, my mind was attaching stories to almost everything I saw. A seated woman dropped a paper right in front me and I picked it up and handed it to her in stride and wondered what I would have done if she had dropped a pen, and then thought about saying, "Hey, since I did you this favor you should lend me a pen."

I walked into the bathroom and saw a kid spiking his very long black hair straight up, and as I settled into my chosen urinal I noticed the kid next to me was texting with his left hand. Couldn't wait 20 seconds, huh? Have to text mid-stream? What if he dropped it in the urinal? That would be awesome, that's what.

As I walked back I coveted a pen that someone had laid down while he was reading. Could I get it? I walked by two offices hoping to notice someone away from their desk. No luck. In the second office, Student Government, I saw a pen cup FULL of sprouting eager pens. Look at them in there with their orgy of pens and happy-go-lucky attitudes. I thought I could just go in there and start writing in my book vigorously and then pretend to put the pen back and walk out with it; a plan that was sure to work except I kept walking while thinking about it and ended up back in third row, left aisle penless.

I lucked out, though. The only thing during class that came close to really needing to be written down was a thought that I should title a previously written story "Aubade x4," but then decided that it was astonishingly awful and decided against it. Of course, what needed to be forgotten is now recollected.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Ugh

I just now, just this second, heard someone complaining about winter because "(They) have no clothes for snow." I understand we can't all love winter as much as I do, but if your beef with it is because you have no clothes fit for snow, then that's a you problem. I know you have lived here for at least a few years but I am guessing you have been here all your life, YOU MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO GETTING SOME WINTER APPAREL! Winter comes at the same time every year, you know.

That being said, it is really coming down outside and I am very happy.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

WTD?! (What the Dump)

People pick the oddest things to care about sometimes. The building that shares a parking lot with my office fenced in their dumpster today. Why? I really really want to know why. I imagine some people in my building put stuff in that dumpster from time to time instead of going around back to use ours, but so what? I have been here for five years and have never seen it so full the lids wouldn't shut all the way, and Salt Lake County's finest are eating across the street at Crown Burger EVERY NIGHT till it closes and park right next to the dumpster, so I am doubting bums are sleeping in there. (Let me say again, EVERY NIGHT and EVERY LUNCH. I imagine they aren't the same cops every time or else they would be dead, but still, I have yet to see one that looks in shape. Also, WTD is up with all these fat cops? Isn't being in shape part of your job?)

So other people may use your dumpster from time to time. Is the waste company charging you per pound now? Does this change your life in any way? Putting a fence around a dumpster is not going to affect you at all. It is going to affect the guy who now has to get out of his truck to unlock and lock the stupid thing. And I bet normally you are just a joy to be around.

In Case You Were Interested 1

I see the Unicycle Kid every Tuesday after class. The Unicycle Kid bothers me.

Other than feet there are two main modes of transportation on campus: the bike and the skateboard. Why would the UK choose the unicycle to get around campus? The answer, of course, is to show everyone that he can ride a unicycle. There really is no other practical reason. It’s definitely not as convenient as the two wheeled version, especially since the campus is set on a slope, there are no handle bars for weaving through pedestrians, no brakes, no gears. And if you are going for image, the image is uber-dorkiness, which last time I checked is not something to be desired. What does someone who rides a unicycle during the week do on the weekends?

First Problem—If there really was something to check, and it wasn’t just a saying, I’m sure I would want it burned immediately because I would think that if someone did do something that didn’t check out on that list, I would say that is all the more reason to do whatever they were doing. But what the UK is teaching me is that I would say that as long as I agreed with what that person was doing. If I didn’t agree, I would use said list to prove my point. I don’t want to be that person. I think people should do what they like, but he shows me that I have exceptions, and that ticks me off.

There are right and wrong reasons to do certain things. Right reasons to ride a skateboard around campus: it’s fun, relaxing between classes, helps you feel more confident. Being that there are so many skateboarders on campus they are all kind of lumped in together, and unless you know one specifically it would be hard to tell why they ride around campus on a skateboard. There is no way to tell, so they get the benefit of the doubt and don’t get scrutinized. However, since the UK is not part of some mainstream grouping he pisses me off. What? Now that one really doesn’t sound like me.

Ever since my little stint in eighth grade where I tried to be a cool kid (which may be a topic for another time) I have, for a large part, believed that the majority is usually wrong. “But that’s un-American,” someone says. Is it? When Good Luck Chuck comes out in the theaters and makes four billion dollars, I know I shouldn’t see it. (How many What Happens in Vegas’s need to be released before people stop going to see them?! You know why there is hardly ever anything good in the theater? It is because we don’t support good movies. Movie makers don’t have to try any more because they make millions of dollars remaking the same BS over and over again as long as they put Jessica Alba and Matthew McConaughey in it. And because of our continual support of this kind of entertainment we are slowly retarding ourselves. Soon the only movies coming out will be an infinite amount of films entitled “Ow, my balls!"* where people just get hit in the nuts over and over again while bare-chested girls jump up and down and celebrate. Yes, I chuckled when I saw that Japanese game show where the contestants have to say a tongue twister and if they mess up they get whacked in the balls, but the reason that is funny is because it shows a complete lack of standards. I have heard very stupid people say that that is what's wrong with America; we don’t have game shows where people get wiener smacked for answering a question wrong. No, you idiot, that is what is right with America. There are still standards. Those game shows are cautionary tales, not something to strive for. But it seems that these standards are starting to slip away. For example, we now have Hole in the Wall, an asinine game show we imported to this country because we are all getting dumber. If all we support is crap, all we will be left with in the end is crap because people will know they can get rich by making crap. Stop it! While I’m here, do you think Ashton Kutcher or Brad Pitt would be where they are today if they looked like Paul Giamatti or Philip Seymour Hoffman? Do we really believe that Jessica Alba is in every single movie since 2003 because she is a good actress? Come on, people. Let’s do better, huh? (I apologize for this extra long parenthetical rant. Moving on)). Whenever I drive by a book store where six-hundred people are standing in the streets dressed as draculas waiting for a midnight copy of Stephanie Meyer, I know I shouldn’t read it (I am assuming you can imagine a similar rant here). The point is (as I am sure you have forgotten) is that when it comes to certain things the majority is almost always wrong. The cool kids may be a small elite group, but the majority accepts the fact that they are the cool kids. ANYWAY, ever since my little stint in eighth grade where I tried to be a cool kid (which may be a topic for another time) I have, for a large. . .dangit! Let’s see. . oh yeah, why am I looking down on the UK for not being part of an accepted group and because I can single him out? How come he doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt?

Riding a unicycle around the university campus just screams, “Look at me!” which we all know is annoying. I guess you could argue that a blog, Facebook, Myspace etc. are all performing the same type of function. I hope a large part of my blog is “read and share with me,” but just about everyone who has a blog would have to admit the majority of it is still “look at me and care about what I have to say.” How much of what we do is so people will look at us? My guess would be somewhere around the area of a lot, and is having people notice you and care about what you do or say a bad thing really? I can’t say that I care about the UK, but I did have to write a post about him and can any human really judge anyone for wanting to be noticed?

See, I don’t want to think these thoughts; I just want to be annoyed that some kid rides around campus on a unicycle, but he has somehow made that very difficult. I hate crossing paths with this unitard because seeing him makes me look at myself, and I don’t like having to do that once a week. You smug one-wheeled tart.

*Watch Idiocracy

P.S. The UK reminds me of the Tight Rope Kid. While living in the Marriot Library at SUU I would observe the TRK as he practiced walking a tight rope between two trees. I just have a hard time understanding spending that much time working on an activity where even if you became the best in the world you would still just be a carnie.

In Case You Were Interested

The last few times I have tried to post something on here it turns into a super long random rant. I try to keep posts on here pretty short, and when I write things that just keep on going and going I never put them on here. I thought that if I just made a segment where stuff like that happened I could give it its own title and then people would know if they want to spend the time reading the long randomness or not.

And so, for your reading pleasure (maybe) I introduce In Case You Were Interested.

Monday, September 22, 2008

For What it's Worth

The video mentioned from the cabin trip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1NyyLo55EQ

A Conversation Overheard at Harmon’s Between Mother and Son That Reminded Me of High School

“Why can’t I go?”

“Because it is going to be packed in the mini-van. There will be no room with everyone. Plus, you need to stay in school, anyway.”

“Nuh-uh. Guess who's getting straight A’s?” The mother held up her hand and they high fived. “Awesome!” she said.

“Not! I’m failing foods.”

“How can you fail foods!”

Friday, September 19, 2008

They Grow Up So Fast


The Skookumish Cabin McCabin Trip

I had a video here of Rob busting his bumper off, but it froze my computer every time I tried to play it.



Almost everyone



Ryan explaining the difference between onesies and footsie pajamas



Sorens



Answer: Articulation. Question: Rob's Favorite Word.





Yup.



Remember Bomberman from when you were little? It's still awesome.




Brett and Boston




Getting ready to pitch to the Babe




Zach and Marjorie

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Too Good to Be True?

Yes. The show was cancelled. I'm depressed.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

09/16/08 - 09/17/08

. . .and even though the times have changed that spirit/I still feel it/it carries on/and even though your life has changed that spirit/ you still feel it/ it carries on/ it carries on in every song


All the bands we love the most/all the songs that give us hope/reasons we're still here today/people change/but the songs remain



Tonight is the first of two Rancid shows in Salt Lake. This concert, although it has not yet happened, is already in my Top Five.




H2O, who has just come out with their first record in seven years and who I have not seen live since I was eighteen (yes, seven years), is touring with Rancid. That last H2O concert is also in my top five. It was one of the last concerts I saw with Punk Rock Kid Tolley before he left for New York and I left for Santiago. He is not able to attend tonight because he decided to be a chump and move to California. Yep, I called you a chump. What are you going to do about it, sissy?






It was announced a couple of weeks ago that Less Than Jake will also be playing this show. LTJ on the first night and H2O the second. When I first saw that LTJ was playing I was pretty sure it was a typo because LTJ was just here with Goldfinger two weeks before, and they had a show in Canada scheduled the night before. I am glad they are coming back because they played at the Murray Theater last time where someone is eventually going to die of heat exhaustion, because they don't have air conditioning, and the crowd was just weird.





The best of Punk, NYHC, and Gainseville Rock in two nights. Holy crap, I'm excited. More posting to follow.














Monday, September 15, 2008

A NO HITTER!


First game back from rotator cuff surgery Zambrano throws a no hitter against the Astros.


I don't have much time and this is the best video I could find. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvFuBnDd-5s
Go Cubs!

Saturday, September 06, 2008

So, I Think it is Time to Return

I think it is time to return to my narcissistic ways and start the ol blog up again. I actually went to start it when school began, but my ideas for the first post back were too extravagant. I had pictured slide shows and music and pictures of all the things that happened to me during the hiatus, but I don't know how to do most of those things and the two weeks that have passed since I decided to start this up again have taught me that I'm not going to learn, so I might as well just start it back up again.

I still would like to think of something better to come back with so think of this as the soft re-opening. The grand re-opening will be soon.

Friday, July 18, 2008

I Am Not Back

I just want to say real quick that if I get one freaking Jib-Jab video sent to me this campaign season (or ever again) I am going to fire bomb whoever sent it to me.

Just stop it.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Hiatus - Getting Lost

Hi. I am going to be taking an extended break from this blog. I will be back in a while. I didn't want to post just that, so I thought maybe I would leave you with a quick b-side. See ya later, and don't forget to get your Rancid/H2o tickets.


"Hey Russ, I watched Crossroads last night."

"Did you like it?"

"Yeah, it was pretty cool."

"The question is would you sell your soul to play like that?"

"Nah, punk rock. Not super necessary," I laughed.

"True. What about you, Daniel? Would you sell your soul to be the greatest musician ever?"

"That would depend," Daniel said.

"On what?"

"On if God existed. If so, I would be afraid to sell God's property; if not, I would have to think about it."

"But there would be a devil," Russ said, "so wouldn't that mean there would be a god?"

"I don't know."

"Maybe we should listen to more Heavy Metal," I said.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

My Favorite Recent Text

Zach: I can't decide what I hate worse, Taco Time or Arctic Circle commercials.

Monday, June 02, 2008

Tiger Army

That was supposed to say Tiger Army.


As the grey sky opens my heart sings
I carry a torch as the New Year rings
And I still feel the same after all this time
A future of past on my mind
Tonight I remember what it was like
To hear the rain's song when you were mine
Now here in this silence my heart dies
Saved by the roar of a broken sky

My phone tried.




Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Three-Day Weekend

He looks. He notices how beautiful the rain is making everything. He listens. He wonders why the noise is so pretty. He sits. He is comfortably cold.

He notices through closed eyes it is getting brighter. He sees the sun. He hears doors open and close as people exit them. He sees children in boots and shorts jumping in puddles. He reminisces. He watches with sadness as the concrete goes dry. He observes that the drier the concrete, the louder the world. He hears the conversations of his neighbors as they invade where he has spent his morning. He asks himself if they wish they would’ve got their work done on Saturday so that they could enjoy the rain today. He thinks it makes them antsy because it is stalling their day. He has nowhere to be. He enjoys rain. He doesn’t know if that makes him happier than they are. He wonders if it makes him sadder. He hears the motor of a lawn trimmer as it slits the air with violent vulgarity. He thinks of ‘V’ words. He wants them (the people and their sonance, not ‘V’ words) to go away, and selfishly wishes for rain.

He sees it grow dark again. He smiles as doors open and close as people enter them. He stops hearing the offensive noises of the afternoon. He is able to listen again. He thinks he knows why it’s so pretty. He wonders what he would choose given one wish. He decides on a girl. He doesn’t know which one, cause there are a few. He falls asleep wishing he knew.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Race

At my desk:

CW: I am going to move some stuff.

Me: Yeah, I got some garbage on my desk because the Mexicans (who clean our building) forgot to empty my garbage and I keep forgetting to do it.

CW: That's so rude, Jeremy.

I was rude because I referred to Mexicans as being Mexican. I asked if said co-worker was in Mexico and was referred to as American if it would be offensive. The answer was yes. Really? Never travel outside of the country then. I spent two years in Chile on a mission for my church and was referred to as American every day. Why? That was the only thing they knew about me! Was it offensive? No. Maybe if I was Canadian. Seriously, you think the word 'Mexican' defines that person? You don't think they are little more complex than that?

By the way, the fact that you think the word Mexican is rude makes you the racist, not me. If they were Canadian and I had said, "The Canadians forgot to empty my trash," you wouldn't have blinked because Canadian doesn't hold a negative connotation, but to you Mexican does. You are the one who judged because of race.

I can't stand these people who will only use certain terms in a sort of half whisper because they are afraid of offending people. Guess what? By doing that you are being offensive! You are treating people differently because of where they are from or the color of their skin. Do you think these people, whatever race, want to treated as a half whisper? I am guessing they would like to be treated like a human being, and would like you to be able to say, "You are from Mexico," or Paraguay, or Japan, or Ireland comfortably and normally without your ass cheeks tightening up. You are the people that are marginalizing those who are different than you. Just because someone is different doesn't mean you should pretend that they're not. You people are the problem.

It's these kind of knobs who walk around saying, "We should all be color blind when it comes to race." No we shouldn't! That is idiotic. If we were all color blind and all saw the same bland neutral color we wouldn't have all the cool international festivals, and the thousands of different kinds of restaurants. Culture is a good thing. We are LUCKY to live in the country we live in. For real, go to Chile, or Peru, or Wyoming, or any other place where you see a person of a different culture once a month. It can get kind of boring.

I also spent the two years getting screamed at, rocks thrown at me, attacked, and sworn at (in English most of the time, because of the movies everyone in the world knows English swear words, but I got my Chilean curses down pretty well too) NOT because of my religion, but because of my nationality. I know how it feels to be treated only on the basis of where you come from, and not because of who you are. I also know what it feels like to sit in a room with uncomfortable people because we were different and they were afraid to offend, or be treated like children because they thought we needed coddling because of our race, and it is offensive. I would rather be around people I can be comfortable with, and doesn't everybody? And sure, with the people we got along with there were some jokes about Americans and we could respond with Chilean jokes and it was good times. Great times. We became close because of our differences and we were comfortable with them. If anyone should know how to do this, it is Americans. The people I was referring to ARE Americans, and I am not going to pretend they are from Norway like me, and I am not going to pretend I am from somewhere else, either. Honestly, if you were in a different country which type of person would you rather hang out with?

Who is the ingorant one here, and who needs to maybe sit back and take a look at how they view the world?

Concert and New Album

Sailing on a silver ship
Out to the open
Lonely and realizing that our friendship's been broken
And a funny thing to me is how quickly it slips away
And leaves you longing for the things
That were never spoken

And you know loving me is not enough
And I know future is as future does

Thursday, April 24, 2008

10K

The Cubs picked up there 10,000th win last in night against The Rockies. The only other team that has 10,000 wins is The Giants.

It's good to see people picking up the slack with Soriano out. That makes six straight. Let's keep it up.

My AL pick, The Indians aren't doing so hot. Which doesn't bother me all that much being a Twins fan, but I am surprised they are doing so horribly. The Twins though are in second (and one game under .500) in arguably the toughest division in baseball which is also surprising. I didn't have a lot hope for them this season, but maybe I should start giving my mistress team a little more credit

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Lunch Break

At my work we are required to take a thirty minute lunch. I ate at my desk today, so now I have to clock out for a half-hour (Is there supposed to be a dash there? I suck at pretty much all punctuation) and I don't know what to do. Actually, I have been sitting here for like 15 minutes trying to figure out what to do for the break. I finally clocked out and decided to write a post, but usually these random ones are kinda dumb. Oh well.

Let's hit shuffle on the ol ipod shall we?

#1 Summer Romance (Anti-Gravity Love Song) - Incubus

Okay, this is probably my favorite Incubus song. S.C.I.E.N.C.E. is easily my favorite Incubus album. I actually don't really like anything after it. I have Make Yourself, but that is as far as I go with the Incubus. Not that the newer stuff is bad, I am just 'meh' on it. My apologies to at least two people I know who read this.


#2 Rudie Can't Fail - The Clash

On the route of the 19 bus!

Sometimes I wish my friend Tolley and I were born fifteen years earlier than we were.


Do You Still Hate Me - Jawbreaker

A Johnny X top five band.

Been hearing about you.
All about your disapproval.
Still I remember the way I used to move you.
I wrote you a letter.
I heard it just upset you.
Why don't you tell me?
How can I do this better?
Are you out there?
Do you hear me?
Can I call you?
Do you still hate me?
Are we talking?
Are we fighting?
Is it over?
Are we writing?
We're getting older.
But we're acting younger.
We should be smarter.
It seems we're getting dumber.
I have a picture of you and me in Brooklyn.
On a porch, it was raining.
Hey, I remember that day.
And I miss you.

So simple and true.


Bullet with Butterfly Wings - The Smashing Pumpkins

I don't know why I remember this, but I remember the first time I ever heard this song. When I was younger I kept our old family stereo in my bed, and when bed time would come I would turn the radio on and fall asleep that way. I woke up like at two or three in the morning once and this song was playing but I didn't know what it was called. Now, I also have a memory of going to school the next day and Cam asking me if I heard the new Smashing Pumpkins song, but I am not sure if that second part really happened. I might just think that because the Pumpkins always remind me of him.

All Good Things Come to an End - Nelly Furtado

Hmm. . .explanation: My friend Lacey who is awesomely awesome and a graphic designer made a CD called Winter Nights for the South SL crew a.k.a The 651's. We all picked two chill songs we wanted on the CD and and she made up the cover and the case and then we had the CD release party at her cabin. Like I said, awesomely awesome.

Yes, that is Will Ferrell laying on a polar bear rug on the cover. Also, the shirt I am wearing says Tampax. That is also courtesy of Lacey. Hooray tampons.

Anyway, we had a Winter Nights B-side as well (Rob is showing both in the middle of the pic), with songs people picked but were too long or weren't sure what to put on etc. This Nelly Furtado song was a B-side picked by Robby. I do like this song, and I do dig a good chunk of this Nelly Furtado album, but I can't listen to it. You see, when Rob bought this album and me and him would drive through the crowded parking lots of Sugarhouse he would crank the music up, roll down the windows, and start dancing and clapping his loud clap to make sure everyone would look at the two dudes in the Rover, one dancing around like a boner, and the other slid as far down in his seat as he could be. He would do this mostly because he knows I hate awkwardness and he gets a kick out of embarrassing me. And he would do this little head nod and tell me every time how he is pretty sure she does that head nod in the video, and I would get so mad at him and he would be tickled. So, now whenever I hear Nelly Furtado I picture Rob clapping and sliding his head from side to side and I get pissed off, thus, no Nelly Furtado for me.

Back to work.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Time Again


Thursday, April 17, 2008

Of Mirrors, Phones, and Hobos

Last night was the Bouncing Souls concert. As always, it was a blast. The night also provided a few additional entertaining moments.

I witnessed one of the dumbest things I have ever seen with my own two eyes last night. I showed up about halfway through the last opening act's set. At Club Sound you walk in the door into a little hallway for eight or so feet and then you reach the floor. Ten feet to the left is a wall that is all mirrors. I went and sat in the corner about 3 feet away from the mirror wall until the band finished. While I was sitting there a guy walked passed me and smacked right into the mirror not realizing it was mirror thinking it was an extension of the building. How awesome is that? He quickly turned around and walked away feeling like a total tool, I'm sure.

While trying not to laugh directly at him a few thoughts went through my head:

Was he just playing chicken with the other guy that was walking right at him?

That must be really weird to smack right into an invisible wall. The split second after must be so bloody confusing.

That had to hurt. I mean when running into something totally unprepared your nose would be the first thing to hit, right? That can't feel good.

I wonder if he will ever tell anyone he knows about that, ever.

That was really funny.

During the concert I felt something under my feet. I stepped on it a few times testing out what it could be because it didn't feel like a cup or a water bottle or something that usually gets trampled. I hip checked the people around me to make room for me to kneel down and get and I found a phone. I held it up shouting, "Whose phone is this?" Nobody claimed it. A kid behind me said, "Hey, free phone." Then a girl next to me said, "Let me see." I handed it to her and she said she'd take it, to which I responded, "I'll take it," and put it in my pocket.

I looked at it when I got outside and it had a text from a kid named Jesse saying, "Will I c u 2 night." 2 night. I hate that.

I text him back saying I didn't know whose phone this was but to have somebody who was at the concert call me. He didn't get it, so I called him. He was still expecting to hear a girl voice on the phone.

"Hey, I don't know whose phone this is. I found it on the ground and am trying to find whose it is."

"A little Asian girl named (I don't remember)."

"Was anyone with her that could call me and get the phone?"

"Hold on."

"Okay."

"I'll just call you back."

I walked to my truck and started listening to how the Jazz lost until she called me, but knowing that it was really a good thing because that means we will play the Rockets instead of the Spurs in round one.

"Hello?"

"You have my phone."

"I do have your phone. Where are you?"

"I am actually not there anymore. I am at 750 south and 7th east."

"750 south 7th east. Okay."

"You are willing to drop it off here?"

"Yeah, unless you want to come back, but I don't feel like just sitting here." That actually sounded rude when I said it, but I didn't mean it to be.

"Okay, thanks so much."

I was parked at a forty-five degree angle and had a huge yellow Ford truck to my right so I couldn't see anything from oncoming traffic, and I was parked on a steep incline so when I let go of the brake with the clutch in I went rolling forward where there was a pretty gnarly gutter. I put my truck in reverse, let go of the clutch and moved back quickly so I didn't roll forward too far. I didn't go all the way because I couldn't see oncoming traffic obviously, but I was off the incline. It is lucky I didn't pull all the way into the lane because if I did I would've ran over a hobo. After I stopped I saw this white flash in my rear view and I looked back and saw a guy with long gray hair and a long gray beard with a white puffy coat on holding a teal colored sleeping bag. The first thought that flashed through my head at 100 m.p.h was the deleted scene from Hot Rod,"Sully ran over a hobo once. So I guess that makes him a stuntman, too." Then thought about how horrible it would feel to back over someone. My window was already rolled down and I said, "Hey."

"I am trying to get some money to buy some cigarettes. That guy over there gave me a couple," and I noticed the two cigarettes he was holding. Now, I am of the belief that if the person is lying to you, and you know he or she is just going to buy cigarettes and booze with it, it still really isn't your place to say if they are lying or not, and it shouldn't be the reason you don't give them anything. They do get bonus points for being honest, though.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there."

"Yeah."

"Here's a couple bucks."

"Thanks. God bless. Be safe."

"You too."

A few minutes later I arrived at 750 south 7th east and the Jesse kid came out first.

"Good. I was thinking maybe I got the numbers mixed up. That would've sucked." Then the little Asian girl in a Good Riddance t-shirt came out.

"It's a little jacked up from getting trampled on," I said.

"As long as it works!"

"True. Alright, have a good night, everyone." Then I think she went to hug me but I'm not sure, either way my body froze up and I took a step back, then realized I probably looked ridiculous so I just stood there for a few more seconds to make it look like I wasn't in a super rush to leave which made for a really awkward few seconds. I was about to say, "Big gulps, huh?" but was interrupted, fortunately.

"Thanks again."

"Okay. Good times." Then I finally turned around and got back in my truck.

A: Why do I call everyone 'everyone?' Even if it is just one or two people? It may stem from the Chilean days and asking people in Spanish 'How are we?' even if it was one person and answering 'We're good,' even if it was just me. That's the only thing I think of.


B: I say 'good times' way too often.

The Bouncing Souls

Harvest moon in a desert sky. Making good time as we pass it by. Wherever this road takes us, it was meant to be.


We're already home.

What are dreams for, anyway, without the guts to live your life that way?

Learned to let go of the things we can't control. Left em behind and followed rock and roll. We found a new way of life. Forever till the end of time. But never getting old.

What are songs for, anyway, without the guts to live your life that way?

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

No Wonder

So I finished the first draft of the story I have been working on. I still have some issues with it, but I have been looking at it and read it so many times I am not sure what to do with it anymore. I don't plan on picking it back up for a long time, but if anyone wants to read it let me know, and I can send it to you.

I have never been a fan of reading stuff on the computer, you just don't really get the same feel it seems. I don't expect you to print it out if you want to read it, but if you work in an office, go ahead and use The Man's paper.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Opening Day - Root Root Root for the Cubbies!


Cubs and Indians in the World Series. Cubs win the 2008 World Series making it exactly 100 years between championships. Call me crazy, but we all know that is how things work in baseball.

Friday, March 07, 2008

Five Birds - February 23, The Greatest Day of 08' so Far

Cam and I woke up early on the 23rd to head up to the Bird. While we transferred gear from his car to my truck we took a gander up at our mountains. They were covered by dark clouds that were over-looking the valley as if to say to all early rising red-cheeked optimistic skiers (I like adjectives today), “Not today.” Now, of course clouds don’t think, let alone perform not to subtle intimidation aimed at people trying to escape the nappy snowless valley for a few hours. They are, in fact, evaporated water molecules that have condensed as they have risen up the mountains to most likely jettison their extra weight on the slopes in order to complete the journey across the peaks, but for the sake of antagonist vs. protagonist and tension and so on, we are going to pretend these are evil clouds. If you need to, take a break and get your noggin wrapped around that and then continue.

We wondered what awaited us inside the belly of the beast, and we did not waver. School, work, marriage, kids, and lets not forget the forever rising ticket prices have stopped my friends and I from shredding the slopes. We gave the beast a quadruple Bird and headed east. On the belly outskirts we found that we may have underestimated our beast. The fog was thick and getting thicker the higher we got. Struggling to follow solid ground we both worried that the beast may overcome, and that visibility would be so bad that if we tried boarding Gad 2 we would smack into a tree, staying alive just long enough to realize how bad our nads hurt. We did not voice these concerns for the sake of morale, and just focused on the humming of the brave engine.

Then, when we thought all hope was lost and we would never return, there it was! A ray of light.

“Is that the sun?” I said.

“We’re gonna get above it!”

We shot out of the beast’s colon two seconds later like triumphant heroes of old. We had found the bluest sky one has ever seen. It was spotless. In the midst of our celebration I forgot I was driving and nearly killed us both. I eventually checked my emotion and gained control of the vehicle.

In the wake of the beast was some of the lightest powder I have ever experienced. The trees of Gad 2 welcomed us with open limbs and smiled upon us as we darted in between them leaving fresh tracks and worry behind.

Let this be a lesson to you all, “He who braves the storm without fear and endures when it seems that all hope is lost, will board some of the sickest cherry cherry pow pow known to man.” That’s in the Bible somewhere, I think. And if it isn’t, it really should be.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Yeah, buddy







Monday, February 04, 2008

Holy $#!*

Face to Face is BACK!! I think I just pooped myself. . .yep. I just pooped myself. And I don't care because I am so happy. I guess life really is alright; Kudos to you, Life.

Press Release

Disconnected from the farewell tour.

Now, I gotta go change my drawers.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Horse Nuts

I got a camera for Christmas and haven't had much chance to use it. I do have some pictures on it, but nothing cool to put on the blog. This sure makes me laugh, though. Zach's face after cracks me up. Yes, I am twenty-five.

Monday, January 14, 2008

On Turning Twenty-Five

. . .courtesy of Jack Kerouac.

"I wished I was on her bus. A pain stabbed my heart. As it did every time I saw a girl I loved who was going the opposite direction in this two-bit world."